No, Not This Time
It’s over this time, I’m done I sayThis little girl’s heart is ready to break
No, things will never be okay
I can’t force a laugh or fake a smile
If it gets harder, when does it get easy?
No, it’ll never be the same
I can’t stop the room from spinning
And I can’t take any deeper breaths
No, this is my choice to make
I know that I’m not perfect
And I realize that I’m weak
No, I’m just never gonna be good enough
The worries,the anger, the stress, the hatred
It all gets taken out in the release on my arm
No, I don’t want your damn attention now
The treatment, it doesn’t help me
My smiles fade away again
No, I can’t even find common ground with my best friend
I lie, I fail, I’ll never get to win
Beause I put up a wall that you can’t break
No, my heart is cold but it isn’t ice
I’m fragile, sensitive, ready to shatter
Any given second could make me snap
No, I know you’ll never notice that
It always feels like I’m so alone
Like there’s absolutely no one to trust
No, I don’t need any sympathy from you
So don’t tell me that I’m brave or strong
That isn’t what I want to hear
No, I know I’m weak and can’t control my tears
You tell me that I can’t please others until I please myself
And that I can’t live my life this way
No, you never knew or heard why I live like this
If you can even call this living, that is
Because now I know I’m all alone
No, the stars don’t seem to shine for me anymore
It was foolish of me to put so much faith
So much hope into one silly story
No, I’ve got a story of my own to tell
A story that won’t touch anyone
Or inspire people to help others
No, I’m just a silly girl with an even sillier dream
The dirt and rainstorms are all I know
The coulds push away my hope
No, I can’t see the stars anymore
Perhaps they never were there to begin with
Maybe I should just erase myself from existance
No, I think the knife will speak for itself
"She’s all mine, don’t let her out!"
And the pills will have their way with me
No, they’ll take care of it so I don’t have to do it myself.
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