More poems by Black'nd.Blue.Rose

With The Thought Of You

It was my mistake
from the very start
and i knew it fairly well
but i couldn't help myself

i didn't want to fall in love
i didn't want to this young
i didn't want to hurt
i was scared of what was love

but you caught me in your grips
and i repelled this relationship
i pushed you so far away
and now i'm so regretting it

i don't even know were you are anymore
or how you have been
i wish that it could be
and that i at least could know
you don't disgrace me

i told my mom that i new were to start
to go to Miami and try the high schools
that i would search you down anonymously
but she says that's just done in fairytale's, sweets

that it's a shame to go that far
that the boy doesn't deserve that much
but i can't help it i just want to know
just anything more about you
my heart craves something so untrue

i wish i hadn't ended the friendship
we had after our relationship
but i was just being so damn stupid
and i'm suffering the damn consequences

i hate it that whenever i read of love
you pop into my head
and that makes me teary and so sad
your the worst feeling i've ever had

yet the best thing that's been in my life
and that if we hadn't moved apart
we might of just been able to of made it in the future
we were just so in sync

and the best of you is that you didn't pressure me
to have sex, you told me when i'm ready
and you said that we could make it
that we'd grow up and you'd still love me

but i hung up on you in such a hurtful way
and never called you ever again
the things i said on the phone those few days
were just so negative and all so sad

that i was going through bad times
and i said that i'd never say i love you
to you i said such distasting things
and confused and lost i flee

and never again we spoke
b/c we moved, ever since that day
all i do is think about you
and if you disgrace me so

i wish that i could ask you
and wonder if u still feel anything
though i'd like for u to be happy
it tears me up inside
knowing that i'll never have you

and i'f one day i get to see you
i know that that night i'll cry
b/c i was so stupid for letting you go
and so i'm left with a heartache
and with the thought if it could of ever been so
wondering how you'd react the fist time u see me again
Dying in the inside.